Nobody knows. Some folks believe grits are grown on bushes and are harvested by midgets that shake the bushes after spreading sheets around them. Many people feel that grits are made from ground up bits of white corn. These are obviously lies spread by Communists and terrorists. Nothing as good as Grits can be made from corn. The most recent research suggests that the mysterious Manna that God rained down upon the Israelites during their time in the Sinai Desert was most likely Grits. Critics disagree, stating that there is no record of biscuits, butter, salt, and red eye gravy raining down from the sky, and that God would not punish his people by forcing them to eat Grits without these key ingredients.
How Grits are Formed.
Grits are formed deep underground under intense heat and pressure. It takes over 1000 years to form a single Grit. Most of the world’s grit mines are in the South, and are guarded day and night by armed guards and pit bull dogs. Harvesting the Grit is a dangerous occupation, and many Grit miners lose their lives each year so that Grits can continue to be served morning after morning for breakfast (not that having Grits for lunch and dinner is out of the question)..
Yankees have attempted to create synthetic Grits. They call it Cream of Wheat. As far as we can tell, the key ingredients of Cream of Wheat are Elmer’s Glue and shredded styrofoam. These synthetic grits have also been shown to cause nausea, and may leave you unable to have children.
Historical Grits
As we mentioned earlier, the first known mention of Grits was by the Ancient Israelites in the Sinai Desert. After that, Grits were not heard from for another 1000 years. Experts feel that Grits were used during this time only during secret religious ceremonies, and were kept from the public due to their rarity.
The next mention of Grits was found amidst the ruins of the ancient city of Pompeii in a woman’s personal diary. The woman’s name was Herculaneum Jemimaneus (Aunt Jemima to her friends.)
The 10 Commandments of Grits
I. Thou shalt not put syrup on thy Grits
II. Thou shalt not eat thy Grits with a spoon or knife
III. Thou shalt not eat Cream of Wheat and call it Grits, for this is blasphemy ..
IV. Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor’s Grits.
V. Thou shalt use only salt, butter, and red-eye gravy as toppings for thy Grits.
VI Thou shalt not eat Instant Grits.
VII. Thou shalt not put ketchup on thy Grits.
VIII. Thou shalt not put margarine on thy Grits.
IX. Thou shalt not eat toast with thy Grits, only biscuits made from scratch.
X. Thou shalt eat grits on the Sabbath for this is manna from heaven.
How to Cook Grits
For one serving of Grits:
Boil 1.5 cups of water with salt and a little butter. [Use milk and they are creamier!)
Add 5 TBsp of Grits.
Reduce to a simmer and allow the Grits to soak up all the water.
When a pencil stuck into the grits stands alone, it is done. That’s all there is to cooking grits.
How to make red eye gravy
Fry salt cured country ham in cast iron pan. Remove the ham when done and add coffee to the gravy and simmer for several minutes. Great on grits and biscuits.
How to Eat Grits
Immediately after removing your grits from the stove top, add a generous portion of butter or red eye gravy. (WARNING: Do NOT use low-fat butter.) The butter should cause the Grits to turn a wondrous shade of yellow. (Hold a banana or a yellow rain slicker next to your Grits; if the colors match, you have the correct amount of butter.)
In lieu of butter, pour a generous helping of red eye gravy on your grits. Be sure to pour enough to have some left for sopping up with your biscuits. Never, ever substitute canned or store bought biscuits for the real thing because they cause cancer, rotten teeth and impotence.
Next, add salt. (NOTICE: The correct ration of Grit to Salt is 10:1 Therefore for every 10 grits, you should have 1 grain of salt.)
Now begin eating your grits. Always use a fork, never a spoon, to eat Grits. Your grits should be thick enough so they do not run through the tines of the fork.
The correct beverage to serve with Grits is black coffee. (DO NOT use cream or, heaven forbid, Skim Milk.)
Your grits should never be eaten in a bowl because Yankees will think its Cream of Wheat.
Ways to Eat Leftover Grits:
(Leftover grits are extremely rare)
Spread them in the bottom of a casserole dish,
Cover and place them in the refrigerator overnight.
The Grits will congeal into a gelatinous mass of grits goodness.
Next morning, slice the Grits into squares and fry them in 1/2″ of cooking oil and butter until they turn a golden brown.
Many people are tempted to pour syrup onto Grits served this way. This is, of course, unacceptable.
IRISH BLESSING BEFORE EATING GRITS
May the lord bless these grits,
May no Yankee ever get the recipe,
May I eat grits every day while living,
And may I die while eating grits.
AMEN
Cypress River Plantation Real Estate – A Life of Leisure
What do you look for in a vacation or retirement home? Obviously a place you can relax in privacy and comfort are essential in your decision making process. Do you enjoy boating? Is swimming on your top list of pastimes? What about sports like tennis or golf? If you could have all these things in one place, plus the opportunity to be surrounded by beautiful nature, would you jump on the deal? At Cypress River Plantation, you can have access to all this and more in the beautiful community consisting almost solely of custom homes. Custom homes mean higher quality and a greater probability for better appreciation through the years.
You enjoy life at a leisurely pace when you call Cypress River Plantation your home. Heron golf course is located alongside the community, as is the Intracoastal Waterway. The subdivision is located mere minutes away from great shopping and restaurants are located nearby as well. With only ten miles between Cypress River Plantation and the fabulous beach, this community leaves nothing to be desired. The most exciting of Myrtle Beach’s attractions are situated close enough to Cypress River Plantation to give you prime access, yet far enough away that you are not affected by noise of traffic or crowds. You can enjoy every day of your life at the quality that others seek from their vacations.
What, other than exciting pastimes, does living in this community provide for its residents? The wonderful East Coast community has exclusive rights to top-notch schools for your children, which can be a very important decision for families choosing between this and other communities to call home. Not only is the location situated within great proximity to fun activities, but it is conveniently placed off of highway 707. This great location gives residents easy access to highways 17 and 544. This means getting anywhere along the Grand Strand from Cypress River Plantation is simple, easy and direct.
If you are thinking about relocating to an East Coast community, Cypress River Plantation could certainly be the right match for you and your family. With great activities like boating, swimming, tennis and golf always at your fingertips, you will never be at a loss as to how to remain occupied while having constantly high amounts of fun. If you are ready to begin a life of leisure and fun-filled activities without relocating to a far-off island, Cypress River Plantation is ready to accommodate your every need.
RE/MAX Urges Lenders to Release Properties
Record Foreclosure Numbers Need to Be Tackled Head On
(Denver, CO, February 10, 2010) – Dave Liniger, RE/MAX International Chairman and Co-Founder, urged government and economic leaders to push lenders to release foreclosures to help speed the housing recovery. Liniger made his comments as a featured speaker at the Five Star Government Forum in Washington D.C. The Forum brought government and industry leaders together to share ideas for building stability in the nation’s housing market.
Here at RE/MAX we are always eager to share out gigantic resources of knowledge with the general public, It’s called giving back! RE/MAX spends more dollars than any other real estate franchise in research, developement and media marketing hands down. It’s no wonder no one sells more real estate than RE/MAX.
Once again the following video is well done and full of valuable information for your taking. Sit back and enjoy. Looking forward to your comments afterwards.
Custom Built Value: Cypress River Plantation, South Myrtle Beach
The homes in Cypress River Plantation, South Myrtle Beach embody the entire Myrtle Beach area. That is, these homes are relaxing, laid-back, prosperous, and make a great investment. Cypress River Plantation is known as one of the most valuable sectors in South Myrtle Beach real estate. This is due to its location and the quality of homes there.
Intercoastal Properties at Cypress River Plantation
Myrtle Beach has a lot to offer, and it’s quite a sprawling town. Cypress River Plantation is located somewhat inland of the ocean. Most of the homes in Cypress River Plantation are located along Collins Creek, a beautiful, winding, and well preserved creek that connects Cypress River Plantation to the Intercoastal Waterway.
Avid boaters and fishers will be delighted to know that Cypress River Plantation is located on land that contains five acres of lakes! This is one of the reasons why people love Cypress River Plantation so much. There is an abundance of freshwater lakes in this neighborhood, but it’s still very close to the ocean. One can see clearly why real estate in Cypress River Plantation continues to appreciate in value.
Why do Families Love Cypress River Plantation?
You can find quiet, peaceful living in Cypress River Plantation. In fact, it’s a great place for a family. Many families have moved into this area, and the area is gaining popularity. Another charming attribute of Cypress River Plantation is the prevalence of indigenous plants and wildlife. Here, one will find plants and animals that are native to South Carolina. In fact, there are some gorgeous birds flying in this area.
You can get a lot of space for your buck in Cypress River Plantation. Many buyers typically buy between one-half acres and 3 acres in this area. Plus, the prices are great. You pay very little, but you get a LOT of space. Some of the two and three acre lots offer great water access, walkways, and even private docks.
Cypress River Plantation is also located conveniently near the Grand Strand and Murrell’s Inlet. This means residents of this area have easy access to the shopping, dining, and other attractions of South Myrtle Beach. However, those areas are far enough away not to impact the quiet living of Cypress River Plantation. This area is really ideal, because you can live quietly, but you are very close to city life if you wish to venture over there.
Most of the lots in Cypress River Plantation offer some great amenities. Many developments have tennis courts, pools, a resident clubhouse, and much more. These large lots are also lined with beautiful trees. This makes Cypress River Plantation one of the most gorgeous neighborhoods in all of South Myrtle Beach.
What Makes South Myrtle Beach Properties a Good Investment?
If you’re looking to invest in South Carolina real estate, then take a look at Cypress River Plantation, South Myrtle Beach. This little-known community offers investors great value for a low price. Plus, the value of these homes is consistently increasing.
Investing in real estate is much smarter than investing with investment bankers, because real estate investments are tangible. A thriving market such as Cypress River Plantation, South Myrtle Beach will pay off for investors.
For all of you who have enjoyed my blog for some time now as well as new readers to my Blog let me say. Thanks for your support and if you have the time visit my newest Blog at:
First-time homebuyers who purchase homes from the start of the year until the end of November 2009 may be eligible for the lower of an $8,000 or 10% of the value of the home tax credit. Remember a tax credit is very different than a tax deduction – a tax credit is equivalent to money in your hand, as opposed to a tax deduction which only reduces your taxable income.
The tax credit starts phasing out for couples with incomes above $150,000 and single filers with incomes above $75,000. Buyers will have to repay the credit if they sell their homes within three years.
Tax Credit Versus Tax
Deduction
It’s important to remember that the $8,000 tax credit is just that… a tax credit. The benefit of a tax credit is that it’s a dollar-for-dollar tax reduction, rather than a reduction in a tax liability that would only save you $1,000 to $1,500 when all was said and done. So, if a homebuyer were to owe $8,000 in income taxes and would qualify for the $8,000 tax credit, they would owe nothing.
Better still, the tax credit is refundable, which means the homebuyer can receive a check for the credit if he or she has little income tax liability. For example, if a homebuyer is liable for $4,000 in income tax, he can offset that $4,000 with half of the tax credit… and still receive a check for the remaining $4,000!
Phase out Examples
According to the plan, the tax credit starts phasing out for couples with incomes above $150,000 and single filers with incomes above $75,000.
To break down what this phase out means to homebuyers who are over those amounts, the National Association of Homebuilders (NAHB) offers the following examples:
Example 1:
Remember, these are general examples. You should always consult your tax advisor for information relating to your specific circumstances.
Homes that Qualify
The tax credit is applicable to any home that will be used as a principle residence. Based on that guideline, qualifying homes include single-family detached homes, as well as attached homes such as townhouses and condominiums. In addition, manufactured or homes and houseboats used for principle residence also qualify.
Higher Loan Amounts
More good news – there is an extension on the additional tier of conforming loan amounts which had been first established in 2008. This tier of home loans are those greater than $417,000, and with a maximum that depends on the area, but is not greater than $729,750. These loans will again be eligible for rates that are slightly higher than conforming loan rates, but less expensive than the standard “jumbo” loan rates.
Additional Housing-Related
Provisions
Tax Incentives to Spur Energy Savings and Green Jobs
Assume that an individual homebuyer has a modified adjusted gross income of $88,000. The buyer’s income exceeds $75,000 by $13,000. Dividing $13,000 by $20,000 yields 0.65. When you subtract 0.65 from 1.0, the result is 0.35. Multiplying $8,000 by 0.35 shows that the buyer is eligible for a partial tax credit of $2,800.
— This provision is designed to help promote energy-efficient investments in homes by extending and expanding tax credits through 2010 for purchases such as new furnaces, energy-efficient windows and doors, or insulation.
Landmark Energy Savings — This provision provides $5 Billion for energy efficient improvements for more than one million modest-income homes through weatherization. According to some estimates, this can help modest-income families save an average of $350 a year on heating and air conditioning bills.
Repairing Public Housing and Making Key Energy Efficiency Retrofits To HUD-Assisted Housing—This provision provides a total of $6.3 Billion for increasing energy efficiency in federally supported housing programs. Specifically, it establishes a new program to upgrade HUD-sponsored low-income housing (for elderly, disabled, and direction to increase energy efficiency, including new insulation, windows, and frames.
Expanding Housing Assistance—This provision increases support for several critical housing programs. It includes $2 Billion for the Neighborhood Stabilization Program to help communities purchase and rehabilitate foreclosed, vacant properties. Assume that a married couple has a modified adjusted gross income of $160,000. The applicable phase out to qualify for the tax credit is $150,000, and the couple is $10,000 over this amount. Dividing $10,000 by $20,000 yields 0.5. When you subtract 0.5 from 1.0, the result is 0.5. To determine the amount of the partial first-time homebuyer tax credit that is available to this couple, multiply $8,000 by 0.5. The result is $4,000.
Example 2:
Housing construction rebounds in November with all areas of country showing strength.
Construction of new homes, helped by better weather, rebounded in November following a setback in the previous month.
The gain is a hopeful sign that the housing recovery is continuing, a development viewed as critical to lifting the overall economy out of recession.
The Commerce Department says construction of new homes and apartments rose 8.9 percent in November to a seasonally adjusted annual rate of 574,000 units. The gain represented strength in all areas of the country although the increase was slightly lower than economists had expected.
Applications for new building permits were also up, rising 6 percent to an annual rate of 584,000 units, a stronger showing than economists predicted.
Custom Built Value: Cypress River Plantation, South Myrtle Beach
"The Lifestyle"
The homes in Cypress River Plantation, South Myrtle Beach embody the entire Myrtle Beach area. That is, these homes are relaxing, laid-back, prosperous, and make a great investment. Cypress River Plantation is known as one of the most valuable sectors in South Myrtle Beach real estate. This is due to its location and the quality of homes there.
Intercoastal Properties at Cypress River Plantation
Myrtle Beach has a lot to offer, and it’s quite a sprawling town. Cypress River Plantation is located somewhat inland of the ocean. Most of the homes in Cypress River Plantation are located along Collins Creek, a beautiful, winding, and well preserved creek that connects Cypress River Plantation to the Intercoastal Waterway.
Avid boaters and fishers will be delighted to know that Cypress River Plantation is located on land that contains five acres of lakes! This is one of the reasons why people love Cypress River Plantation so much. There is an abundance of freshwater lakes in this neighborhood, but it’s still very close to the ocean. One can see clearly why real estate in Cypress River Plantation continues to appreciate in value.
Why do Families Love Cypress River Plantation?
You can find quiet, peaceful living in Cypress River Plantation. In fact, it’s a great place for a family. Many families have moved into this area, and the area is gaining popularity. Another charming attribute of Cypress River Plantation is the prevalence of indigenous plants and wildlife. Here, one will find plants and animals that are native to South Carolina. In fact, there are some gorgeous birds flying in this area.
You can get a lot of space for your buck in Cypress River Plantation. Many buyers typically buy between one-half acres and 3 acres in this area. Plus, the prices are great. You pay very little, but you get a LOT of space. Some of the two and three acre lots offer great water access, walkways, and even private docks.
Cypress River Plantation is also located conveniently near the Grand Strand and Murrell’s Inlet. This means residents of this area have easy access to the shopping, dining, and other attractions of South Myrtle Beach. However, those areas are far enough away not to impact the quiet living of Cypress River Plantation. This area is really ideal, because you can live quietly, but you are very close to city life if you wish to venture over there.
Most of the lots in Cypress River Plantation offer some great amenities. Many developments have tennis courts, pools, a resident clubhouse, and much more. These large lots are also lined with beautiful trees. This makes Cypress River Plantation one of the most gorgeous neighborhoods in all of South Myrtle Beach.
What Makes South Myrtle Beach Properties a Good Investment?
If you’re looking to invest in South Carolina real estate, then take a look at Cypress River Plantation, South Myrtle Beach. This little-known community offers investors great value for a low price. Plus, the value of these homes is consistently increasing.
Investing in real estate is much smarter than investing with investment bankers, because real estate investments are tangible. A thriving market such as Cypress River Plantation, South Myrtle Beach will pay off for investors.
